Archive for November, 2010

Avril’s nude photos…. just new age shock marketing

There is so much nudity on TV these days…I just sit there and shake my fist.

Marketing gimmick or campus project?

Nyambura Nyambura Nyambura…. Why did you put out or allow to have these nude, or semi-nude if we are going to split hairs, photos taken.

Maybe I should just try to answer that question myself…..

We live in a funny age, a time in which a boy who sings like a girl has 6,000,000 followers on twitter, that is six times the saintly Dalai Lama does, and he actually has something to teach this selfish world, this is an age in which supposedly masculine men are wearing nut-hugging jeans that their sisters would have to hop around like in a sack race to barely get into, an age in which the biggest pop star, Lady gaga, claims to be a dyke who may or may not be transsexual, a time in which it’s acceptable for Kanye to release pictures of his penis to promote an upcoming album.

Who has nude pics and sex tapes ever hurt really?

Kim Kardashian’s money spinning party hosting and now pop career was set on its way via a sex tape with C-list singer Ray J, Paris Hilton gained notoriety and fame and ultimately made money off a sex tape, nude photos of just about every singer who has fallen off badly are seemingly an acceptable way to revive interest in one’s career. Locally, Kaz never really lost anything, besides her dignity if you believe her, by having her nude photos “leaked” on the internet. She might even have gained a few fans who have a penchant for seeking out nudity as opposed to listening to afro-fusion.

So why are we surprised that Avril has some nude photos on some facebook profile aptly named “Avrils Nipols”? A girl has to try and jumpstart a fledgling career you know. After all in this fickle music industry that we have, where people are know more for bling than for actual talent, and where the most popular group basically puts out different songs with the same basic and weak concept (kushoto kulia, hapa kule, kare….. SMH!) who is to blame somebody who is sharp enough to know a picture is worth a thousand kapuka throw-aways.

I encourage more of our femcees and divas to embrace this new-age marketing gimmick, not, just, because I enjoy seeing nude photos or tapes, but because it is about the only way to catch the attention of a generation with hyper ADD. And am not surprised that the Avril photos have a lesbian twist to them, after all the most popular female rapper/autotune garbage peddler out now also pretends to be a bisexual.

 

Oh, Avril claims to have done the photos as part of a course in campus….. what campus? The L-Word University of sexology? Try again sister.

And thank you for the photos, I won’t be checking out your music though

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Do you realize how gullible you are?

If you were urged to sign a petition demanding strict control or total elimination of the chemical “dihydrogen monoxide.”

The reasons being:

  1. it can cause excessive sweating and vomiting
  2. it is a major component in acid rain
  3. it can cause severe burns in its gaseous state
  4. accidental inhalation can kill you
  5. it contributes to erosion
  6. it decreases effectiveness of automobile brakes
  7. it has been found in tumors of terminal cancer patients

Would you do it?

A student got a first prize at a Science Fair by posing this question. He was attempting to show how conditioned we have become to alarmists practicing junk science and spreading fear of and about everything in our environment.

Dihydrogen Monoxide has the chemical symbol H2O and is reffered to in everyday language as “water”

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AFC Leopards has twice as many fans as Gor Mahia…..

Ingwe vs Kogalo

The KPL titans

There is no doubt that AFC Leopards and Gor Mahia have the largest fan base in Kenya, the
tragic stampede being regrettable evidence of that.
The likes of Sofapaka, Mathare, Tusker and Ulinzi would be hard pressed to fill bus with fans.
The real question is: Between AFC and Gor, who has more supporters?
I will attempt to use Kenya’s 2010 census results and apply an algorithm, rife with conjecture and
unknown values, to come up with spurious numbers that provide more heat than illumination.

According to the census, the top ethnic communities by numbers are Kikuyu at 6.62 million,
Luhya 5.33 million, the Kalenjin at 4.96 million, and Luo 4.04 million,
Others are Kamba (3.89 million), Kenyan Somali (2.38 million), Kisii (2.21 million), Mijikenda (1.96 million), Meru (1.65 million), Turkana (0.99 million), Maasai (0.84 million), Teso (0.33 million) and Embu (0.32 million) among others.
Assumption number one is all Luhyas support AFC but only “n” are active fans, thus AFC fans
who are luhyas = 5.33 X n Assumption number two is all Luos support Gor but only “n” are active fans, thus Gor fans who
are luo = 4.04 X n
Assumption three is the likely number of Bantus supporting AFC as opposed to Gor is an
abitrary ratio of 4 to 1, therefore among the football fans who are Kisii, Mijikenda, Kamba,
Kikuyu, Teso, Embu and Meru with active fans being a factor of “m” AFC would have 4/5(16 X m)
and Gor 1/5(16 X m)
Assumption four is that Nilotes supporting AFC as opposed to Gor is a ratio of 1 to 2 (the lower
ratio as compared to Bantu is because Luos are riverlake nilotes, the others are highland and
plain nilotes, besides their kingpins are in each others cross hairs), therefore among football
fans who are Kalenjin, Turkana and Maasai with active fans being a factor of “m” AFC would have
1/3(6.8 X m) and Gor 2/3(6.8 X m).
We can assume both teams get equal support from Kenyan somali, whites, Asians etc
Therefore assigning a value of 0.25 to “n” and 0.15 to “m”,
The total number of AFC supporters will be: (5.33 X 0.25) + 4/5(16 X 0.15) + 1/3(6.8 X 0.15) =
3,590,000 fans
The total number of Gor supporters will be: (4.04 X 0.25) + 1/5(16 X 0.15) + 2/3(6.8 X 0.15)
1.01+480,000 = 2,170,000 fans
Ingwe has almost twice as many fans as Kogalo according to my ridiculous mathematics

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